The robots aren't coming for the NFL – they're already here


If Rex Ryan and Chip Kelly are fired before the start of the next season, faceless automatons will truly control the league

Growing concern that we’ll all eventually lose our jobs to titanium-plated humanoids soared last week when president-elect Donald Trump announced he will nominate restaurant executive Andy Puzder for labor secretary. Puzder, who would head the government agency that is supposed to protect American workers, is on record saying that he actually isn’t a big fan of American workers. In fact, he much prefers automaton laborers over real human beings: “They’re always polite, they always upsell, they never take a vacation, they never show up late, there’s never a slip-and-fall, or an age, sex or race discrimination case.”

He’s not wrong about the politeness. Humans can be real jerks. Take Andy Puzder, for example.

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