The only thing as big as his shoulders is his personality.
I’m very happy whenever the world’s most swole soccer player is in the news
There isn’t another soccer player in the world like Adebayo Akinfenwa. The 38-year-old striker has spent the better part of the past two decades toiling in relative obscurity in the third- and fourth-highest leagues in England playing for teams like Torquay United and Rushden & Diamonds. But he’s by far the most famous player at that level of English football. Why? Because he’s the strongest soccer player in the world.
Akinfenwa has the honor of being the player with the highest strength rating ever year in the FIFA game series and one look at him makes it obvious why. He’s a barrel-chested man with biceps like pythons and a mountain range where his shoulders should be. He looks like you took an NFL linebacker and plopped him in the middle of a soccer pitch. And yet, he’s still as agile and skillful as you’d expect a striker to be.
The only thing as big as Akinfenwa’s shoulders is his personality, which was on full display on Monday. Akinfenwa’s club, Wycombe Wanderers, defeated Oxford United to earn promotion to the Championship, England’s second division. Neither Wycombe nor Akinfenwa had ever played above the third tier, so after the game, Akinfenwa was in a jubilant mood and he gave a truly delightful interview to Sky Sports.
He made jokes. He got serious. He had hype men. It was great.
Akinfenwa had been on this stage before. In 2016, his late penalty helped AFC Wimbledon earn promotion from League Two to League One, but he and his manager had decided shortly before the game that he would be released from his contract. In another interview with Sky Sports, Akinfenwa said, “I think I’m technically unemployed, so any managers, hit me up on the Whatsapp and get me a job.”
Now, Akinfenwa isn’t looking for jobs on Whatsapp, but his DMs are still open. After Wycombe’s big moment, he told Jurgen Klopp, the manager of Premier League champions Liverpool, to get in touch.
“Let me tell you something,” Akinfenwa said, “the only person that can hit me up on WhatsApp this time is Klopp, so we can celebrate together. You get me? Oi!”
Sure enough, Klopp (at the urging of Liverpool captain Jordan Henderson) sent Akinfenwa a video message.
Though he could joke about it at the time, being cut must have stung Akinfenwa. After helping lead Wycombe to promotion for the second time in four years, he used the Wimbledon slight to make a point about believing in yourself.
“For me, life and football is all about opinions,” Akinfenwa said. “Four years ago, somebody gave an opinion on me, and that was their opinion. I hope my story shows that the only opinion that matters is the opinion you have about yourself. I was lucky and blessed to find a manger and players who believed in me.”
The best of SI
Dan Snyder still won’t admit he was wrong. ... Washington’s name change is the right decision made for the wrong reasons. ... One question facing each MLB team. ... Manchester City’s successful appeal of its Champions League ban has wide-ranging implications.
Around the sports world
Rockets forward Bruno Caboclo didn’t know he wasn’t allowed to leave his room for two days after arriving at Disney and now has to quarantine for more than a week. ... Oakley made a mouth shield to put in NFL helmets so players can basically wear masks on the field. ... Tight end Greg Olsen has signed on to become Fox’s No. 2 NFL analyst after he retires. ... Elena Delle Donne’s personal doctor says she’s at high risk for COVID-19 due to Lyme disease but the WNBA’s doctors don’t think so and have denied her opt-out request.
Are you really good with the food?
His mom was disappointed
Patrick Mahomes got the coveted 99 Madden rating
Manchester United is breaking fans’ hearts so sports are almost back to normal
“Red Clouds” is very bad
Clinical finish
This joke isn’t really that funny but the fact that so many former Rays/Marlins are making it is very funny
Close enough
Twin Cities or Thomas Crapper?
Not sports
The lawyer for an influencer who calls himself “The Billionaire Gucci Master” claims his client was “kidnapped” by the American government in Dubai. ... Johnnie Walker is going to start selling paper bottles of whisky. ... Newspapers discovered in a melting glacier on the Swiss Alps are believed to be from a 1966 plane crash.
Make this an Olympic event
This video is over an hour long, but that’s the point
A good song
Email dan.gartland@si.com with any feedback or follow me on Twitter for approximately one half-decent baseball joke per week. Bookmark this page to see previous editions of Hot Clicks and find the newest edition every day. By popular request I’ve made a Spotify playlist of the music featured here. Visit our Extra Mustard page throughout each day for more offbeat sports stories.